A collection of the Shittiest and most pretentious Poems I've ever written
If it isn't clear already, these are not great but they exist so you can't escape that. They are unedited with many grammatical mistakes that I hope the grammar police can ignore (just this once).
1.
Thinking of the world
Dreaming of flying high
Brought back down
Vulgarity of masses
A small shell of hopes
Within which we thrive
Living the dream
Now waiting to die
Oh how lovely it would be to dream again
To cover my eyes and sleep forever
gross hands peeling away my cover
Revealing the ugly reality
Where my shoulders are disturbing
Where my smile horrendous
Where my will is ignored
Where my mind is in chaos
Where I've to choose
The cruelty of life giving me a choice again
Oh how cruel life has to be? To give me a choice again?
2.
Remember how you close your eyes when the wind blows?
So you feel the wind and see something not there
Remember how you sleep when you are tired?
So you dream and relax and all worries fade away
Remember how they sell fantasies that you buy?
So all your senses are where they are not
That is why I am pretentious
The world holds too little and too much all at once
Thousand wonders to see
Each wonder with hundreds of stories to tell
Each story with a pain I can't bear
And so instead I dream
Wonders and stories
With no pain, no suffering
Where we don’t die for others to reign
3.
It festered
It hurt
It scarred
But at least it stayed
4.
Fools say reason doesn’t matter
It’s all that matters
When all else is lost
The reason is what we grasp on to
It is the anchor
It is the compass
It is the earth
One man's hero other man’s villain
One woman’s justice other woman’s cry
Actions may be hated
Reasons need to be understood
Cause that’s all humans have
Reasons-if nothing else
5.
‘The girl that ran away
Returned on a
Nice Sunny day
She left in a storm
In a hurry
Details a bit fuzzy
Freedom and liberation
Or something
I think
The town stares now
An enigma before them
That was obnoxious
It was quite quiet
The quiet girl
reading poetry said
‘A queen has returned home
To reclaim her throne
Run scramble hide
There’s fire in her eyes’
She was ignored
And the town stared
No one knew when
But knew she’d leave
Even familiar
A cage is a cage
6.
How many dreams have the patriarchy crushed?
The ball was lost in the tall grass, the boys looked for it
And no one saw the problem in that phrase
It wasn’t odd that they played
As we sat in the corner
A man got off the bike a bag slung on his shoulders
His formal clothes dishevelled, he was home
A woman coughed in the smoke and wiped the sweat off her face
Dusting her hands she wondered ‘where is her home?’
A woman tried to speak
her son yelled and left
Her husband changed the channel
her daughter watched, silent
A man returned, his daughter gave him a glass of water
The woman cooked and the son played
A perfect home so beautiful
No one saw the blood- they saw the glory
7.
You ignore my scream and listen to his whisper
You ignore my passion and like his indifference
You ignore my wish and adore his whim
You ignore my life and embrace his lie
8.
I could have been normal
If only you’d been human
I would have loved them
I would have accepted their love
The flowers and the songs
And now I only see the thorns
I was a girl
Young and foolish
Naive and unknowing
You tainted something so pure
I've lost it for my entire life
The act of love so pure and safe
You put your dirty hands all over it
Tainted something so sacred
I look at it like sacrilege
Tainted something so pink
I look at it with red in my eyes
Tainted something so pure
I can only see the blood
I can't love them like others would
I can't be what I was
You killed the girl in me before I could understand childhood
How do I give them what they want
It's in a grave you dug
You buried me and my love
Left a shell for them to love
How long until they figure out that
There is nothing but pretense
How long can they love a body
How long until they crave a soul
I give them stars without the shine
The sun without the warmth
What am I worth? Nothing
I can never be heather
I am one of the fictional people they love
They read books and fall for the heroes
They see me and fall for my act
How do we tell them it doesn't last?
I can never be more than one night
Someone they remember when they lose their love
I am easy, I am their plan b
An answer to their lust
I drive right on the roughest patches
Never letting them know my reaches
How detached from reality I must be
I almost forget you gave me my scars
Speeding through all the red lights
Getting caught in all wrong feelings
Holding in every one of your regrets
Beating myself up on your mistakes
Breaking the hearts of innocent lovers
Walking on their broken pieces
Smiling with wide-open eyes
Cannot hide my gift of tears
Ripping up all my memories
Every smile vicious, every intention wrong
Black-tinted glasses, teeth, and hurt
Fictional people they love
Can never be a reality
I could have been normal
Only if he had been human
9.
I love my home
All its features will be lost on others
So magnanimous it can't be put to words
So insignificant it barely deserves any words
I still love my home
I stand looking at the glory outside my window
The tall trees and warm sun
I could stay here forever
If not for the tears in my eyes
I know i cannot stay
My body compels me to move
To run away and not stay
The desire burns within
My heart so heavy i can feel it pulling me
I will run away and miss my home one day
My home that i love so much
My home, home to my demons
Home even to my nightmares
Home that is my freedom and prison
All the same
10.
Happiness is an illusion
A social construct
Something we pursue and never achieve
By the mere fact of it being unattainable
But what do I call the feeling I have now?
Maybe it doesn’t need a name
It’s a good feeling along the scale
A smile that doesn’t leave
Songs that make me dance
People make me wonder
World feels simple
With [y] problems I can conquer
Maybe I’ll, just for this once,
Call this happiness
11.
I’d be a pathetic mourner
I won't wail, i won't scream
I won’t call out to the dead
I won’t recall memories aloud
I won’t give them what they want
I won’t give them a spectacle
I won’t be locked up in my room
I won’t refuse to eat
I won’t refuse to sleep
I won’t give them something to belittle
I won’t be a glaring disappointment
I’d instead sit there with them
Won’t wail won’t hide
I’d sit there with a stoic face
Silent tears and clammy hands
I won’t give them a spectacle
Nor give them something to belittle
I’ll grieve without knowing
I’ll grieve without giving
12.
What is happiness?
If not being amazed by something you knew would be amazing
Stories fill me up
So much so I’d burst
Every new one makes me feel so
But this infinite heart always craves more
Ever expanding, eating up stories
I crave emotions reality does not grant
I find life in the lifeless modes
Those pages thrill me and leave me wanting
That screen holds my gaze, my love like none will
I give so much i never knew i had
I give until i’m always almost empty
My love deserves not the title
I love others better
13.
It’s that feeling you get
When the whole world seems against you
Everyone and everything ready to attack
You see it in their eyes
You hear it in their words
The slight glances
The casual sexist jokes
The tshirts proudly proclaim
No guarantee, Girls -made in china
Thousand knives cutting
Slicing your flesh from each side
You feel the anger
You feel the rage
You feel it all
And yet let it go
Not worth it, you think
You have lost the fight in you
You are drained of the rebel
You take in in silent
It was never meant for you, you think
Yet you die each time you see
14.
Let me crash
Don't try and break my fall
Don't think of my comfort
don't try to save me
Let me fall
Let me crash
Let me go
Hard cruel unforgiving
I’ll be okay
I’m familiar with the cruelty
Complete ignorance is bliss
Don't give me bits and pieces of you
Slowly cutting down
An addict cut off slowly
Throw me off the cliff
Show me that mercy
It won't kill me i swear
Tear her heart down
Don’t coat it with sugar
Your mercy is ruthless
Your grace leaves me scathed
Sympathy has no use for me
Save it for beggars and worshipers
Not a porcelain doll
Don’t need to be shiny
Ruin me the same way you loved me
Careless, sudden, passionate, irrational
It started with sparks
Let it end with fireworks
A small flame built our house
Demolish it with a blast that’ll put montag/cersei to shame
Your chérie is resilient
Baby she doesn't need bandaids
She lived before you
She’ll live long after you
She’ll stride along
Broken hearts and songs under her steps /
Breaking hearts mending songs
Her pride whimpers at your merciful assault
Don’t prick it with needles
Stab it with the knife beneath your folds
Let the blood flow out
It’ll dry up hardening her pride
Her heat needs the release
Anger and hurt pouring through
She’ll be free
Free of you
Free of your sympathy
Free of her heart
15.
We lit a fire that put hell to shame
Consuming us all
Such sparks they were
Gliding on ice, falling with grace
Leaving burnt embers of our love
We left what could have been
A what if? We'd rather not answer
It started with sparks let's end it with fireworks
Again.
16.
It's funny how things work
How emotions change, and the world turns
It's funny how things go unexplained
How we stop looking for answers
They seem difficult
The peace is easy
One part triumphs over another
Sometimes it resurfaces and leaves you broken
Its funny how things work
How days smile and nights cry
How together you feel free and trapped apart
How one minute it's okay and second it's falling apart
How decisions seem simple
And yet they are not
How people's problems are easy to solve-
black and white as stars and sky
how your problems form a pallet of colours
where you cannot tell apart one from other
so you stay in the confusion
wondering if this is life
and you die wondering
Was this life?
17.
The things i have let others do to me
Puts all the demons to shame
What i have allowed them to take
What i have so freely given should have been hidden
Guarded with life
Honour and respect
Life itself depends on it
I was whole
I could have been whole
Yet now you see scraps of me
After the lions and jackals have had their share
What remains but bones?
They took what i treasured
Forced it off my hands
And it lost value
Threw it away for anyone who asked
Like throwing pearls at pigs
I destroyed myself better than they ever could
I showed them ruination like never before
I handed the ‘how to’ to my destruction
They thought they’d send me to hell
But i fell farther than the devil
18.
red is the ultimate me
red is the ultimate it
oh how wonderful it is
to be a red amongst the blues
its blood that's holy
it's the hands of a killer
roses and diamonds
smiles and rings
staining my fine carpet
running through your halls
it's promise that you always break
red becomes everything you need
it protects you from everything you fear
until it bleeds you with betrayal
licking you wounds and it returns
shining armour your brave knight
prince charming and his scarlet smile
your lover and his crimson name
they draw your heart out and play
narcissist that you fall for
flirts and and gloats
showing off their pretend scars
scratching your past
smearing hands red
pretty lies prettier words
i loose my senses
my friends pull me back
underline your name red
(i write poems about you
after a month
my ex got a lousy note
2 years of love left )
a month since august and i have a folder of you
all my feelings pouring out in words
2 years i was with my lover
spent more ink on you than him
is this how those great writers came to be?
unchecked passion, gave it all too soon too fast
19.
I threw away my favorite t-shirt
Cause you said i wore it too much
And i lost a little of myself that fateful day
I have friends that are close to my heart
But not my dark past
I hide my thoughts better than my acne scars
I’ve spent so much time changing everything about myself
Just to fit better the case, now i don't know
They say it's all a part of growing up that that's how you know you’ve matured
But i don't know if i’m changing and growing and getting anymore wiser than i was
I hid behind my scraggly mask
Disfigured ghastly and nastly
I am no oil painting the artists’ make
I am the palette left behind
I look at my old lovers
Seeing chances of redemption
All those choices i made
Sacrifices to reach you
Dust has settled the books i bought
They tell me my story
Picturing me a little too clearly
I see my end and all that i was
I’d accept the oblivion
The drugs of fantasy
Than the reality of the trees
The degeneration i see clearly
You could see me crying and crawling and
never getting to where i was headed
I always searched for the highest cliffs to jump off
The wisest books to burn
I never stopped running off
To the worst people i could think of
I always talk about how i want what they have
Those sweet nothings, sloppy kisses, and my knees weak
How my perfect fairytale exists in my mind
How i dance about those lines
And then i run
Chasing away all hopes and dreams
Never making it to reality
I break everything that could have been mine
Wasting no time, i destroy what could have been
20.
I ride on a high fucking horse
Above the world of
my classmates my bullies
People i love, those who hate me
Blue skies and wind in my hair
I’d let everyone die without care
Rot to death without a blink
Unless there’s a legit kink
There comes a gentleman
Gallivanting through the crowds
Green eyes, dark hair
Straight outta writers dreams
Biting my nails, anticipating
He got me picking my skin
Blowing eyelash wishing for him
Calling his dad my father in law
Planning out our life’s
Landed on the ground
Keeping my eyes around
Snug with him in a blanket
Our love the sweetest secret
Sweet lies and deception
His hands exploring
He did not hear my no
In all the languages i knew
Told me i loved him
In all the languages i knew
Red in my face
Only for us to get through
How did the rapist get saved?
Apollonian crime
The honeyed lies
Treacherous stretches
“I asked for it with my dress”
Recriminations and humiliation
Unpack all my demons
With no rhyme or reason
There was no knifing, no killing
Only my heart that twisted around
I climbed on that horse again
Pulling out my hair
Swore off men
Never to feel impure
